I do not know if this is going to qualify as readable material. But considering the fact that the only readers of this blog are one’s parents and few doting cousins, I suppose I can use this for therapeutic purposes.
Hatred. I wonder if the people who use this term actually and truly understand the complete meaning it implies. I wonder if they can relate to the dark and heavy emotion that is defined by it. Do they really understand the intense feeling it evokes?
I did not.
Several events in the recent past have made me intensely dislike a person. Even the sight of that individual makes my blood boil with fury. Every feature on her face, every word of hers fills me with a mad desire to slap her right across her face. I look at her and I can see only hypocrisy and fake-ness. Every time I look at her, I get intensely reminded of her cunningness and manipulative nature. I cannot bear to even stand for a moment, the show that she puts up in public, for I see through her so clearly. It sends a shiver down my back when I see the unfairness of her actions.
I have never known this intense feeling before.
It is like a dark cloud that hovers over my thought just bursting to break into furious rain.
It is a strange energy that takes over my senses lending them a fierce-ness that I have never known before.
It is like an angry wave that lashes against the shore, never satisfied and retaliates again and again.
It is like the burning fire that devours with unfulfilled hunger.
It is like the restless chatter of a madman.
It is like the energy in a clenched fist.
It is like the sparkle in the eyes of a wild beast.
It is like the redness of blood.
Hatred. It is the evil energy that clenches your chest in a most frustrating manner. It is that weight that you just cannot manage to lift. It is frustrating and obsessive and passionate.
It is the poisonous apple in the garden of Eden , a bite of which shall put you to eternal agitation .
A bite and you are chained , like me , weighed down with the heavy knowledge of hatred.
I crave for an antidote.
Innocence , I offer a tear on your grave.
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19 comments:
you have no idea about real hatred..you need to watch football..learn about norway black metal to know what hatred is..what you have is more the anger that someone who deserves not and still gets everything they would want..justice and hatred are never related..free
hatred is more damaging to the person than the person whom you hate. I feel only solution is empathy. Just put urself in that persons shoes and see why she was doing what she did. It may be her frustrations, her naivety or pure lack of sense.
@ Soin
Even this is fairly unbearable for me . I dont want to know anything more of this devlish thing called hatred.
Its just not that the person in consideration gets stuff which they dont deserve.
It seriously irritates me to look at her , i have to apply high levels of self constraint to not go and slap her. And when she talks...Uff! I can only just storm off from that place.
And its really irritating me because i've never felt this way about anyone else , and i feel guilty of feeling like this about her.
@ ZB
I cant empathise with this particular person at all , ZB. Everything she does is totally against my value system. It only angers me. Raises my BP.
I hate this feeling called hatred. I almost feel a little guilty. But i cant help it , this hatred thing cannot be controlled.
hold on just a little bit..it wont last forever-you wont need to look at that face forever..dont feel guilty..it will pass..and one day it will seem just a sad but strangely amusing story from the past..
I can so imagine and so relate to this..hatred..I have felt it too for some people..
but I realized that this hatred is just a venom within our mind and would affect us adversely rather than the person we hate...try to stay calm, ignore or do something coz this feeling just blinds you...
One of the best posts that I have read in a long time and strangely it is about intense hatred! well, however bad hatred is, it inspired you for some wonderful and dark writing :)
@ Rajani
Hmm...now that you said it , i am looking at it that way. maybe all this will become an amusing story from the past. Maybe when i am an old lady , i shall look back and laugh at my hot-headed ness.
@ Aman
I know. It really binds you. Every time i feel that rush of anger , i give myself a pep talk inside me head and will myself to think of something else. Its irritating , really.
@Nikita
I am flattered that you think that this was good writing. I'd say this was hugely therapeautic. I feel so much better.
This is called blog-therapy! :-)
Def readable, Rini! Thats what we do in blog, try to understand ourselves honestly. Hatred is a strong emotion; like acid, it erodes your mind and soul. It is your problem and not that of the person you hate. It harms you alone. Try to understand the root cause and pull it out completely.
:) rest of the world too reads this blog :)
and hatred exists everywhere, its just love is more powerful :)
yeah,no"body" reads ur blog. we all are spirits.bah.
naice writeup.know wot u mean.hate sm1 like that too. not good fr health,i must say. takes the pleasure outta certain things,this hatred.
'hi' after a long time!n this very post reminded me of 2 mortals i hate worse than anything in life...!
Hey check out my new song,i've uploaded in my blog...listen n tell me how it is
An expressive, sincere soliloquy... I sure hope it was therapeutic. I enjoyed it and it sounds like a leaf right out of everyone's book, except that the intensity of the emotion varies.... i feel it is a commonplace emotion, give or take the intensity
@ Mr B,
This was written in a moment of anger It has passed and though i dislike this person still..i dont let that negative feeling affect myself!
@ Smalltown Girl
Well said..
@ Totallimeh
Of course i was fishing for compliments like " Oh we love your blog"
:-]
@ kochu
I am sorry i had to remind you of such souls that you hate. Anyway listened to the song..really good!
@ Individual
Hello..and how r u? yes , it was therapeutic and i feel much more positive now that it is out of my system.
Anyhow..when,oh when are you planning to start that blog?
Its time , mister..given your vocab. i had to google to get the meaning of soliloquy.
few days later you won't feel good about this post, though it is well-written.
watch things without wishing for a change. and be slippery.
only then you will be free.
Hatred is one of the most powerful of feelings, kind of a priced possession. Just make sure that you’re not wasting it.
Have felt dislike and frankly hatered once to unimaginable depts and that was enough to last a lifetime.... I hated it.
And like most others have said and am sure as you too must have realised... its us it affects the most. TC.. the only antidote my dear is always forgiveness and not to expect much. You might just find your own, if you do...share.
@ venu sir
I didnt , for a minute , enjoy writing it. I only wrote it because it was so much on my mind that it was suffocating.
@ Arun
Oh dont worry about that , i am investing this on a very well-deserved person.
@ Ashwathy
In the beginning it really used to bug me. Then , whenever i started getting that really intense feeling , i would try repeating inside me mind all the assorted philosphy i had read and give myself a pep talk on the necessity to stop hating , how it affects you etc...
It really didnt work.
Now a days , i've accepted the fact that this person deserves to be hated , and stopped feeling guilty of hating her..and viola! The feeling lost its control on me.
Seriously..the higest form of hatred is indifference.
now i am indifferent to this person..i dont hate her.
Well phrased! Between publishing this blog post, sure must have helped vent. :-)
hatred..its a sinking feeling..yet powerful to take us down with it!
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